Nip Slip

Yesterday was my big day, university graduation. The day you’ve been waiting for since the first day of your undergrad. The day was as brutal as can be expected, long, boring and filled with pictures. However, I did leave the day with a wonderful wardrobe malfunction which could almost be considered a highlight from the three hour ceremony. Last week, with the help of my roommates I chose an off white coloured dress which I loved, but they insisted that it was somewhat see through. The straps of the dress were too dainty to wear a bra under so I bought the dress with the plan of buying nipple covers, which I did. The night before the ceremony I tried everything on and it looked fabulous, so I was happy with my wardrobe choice and adjustments. The next day upon arriving at the university I was given my graduation robe and hat. Now wearing a robe in the middle of June would make anyone abnormally warm, but I have an overheating problem. For example, I’m one of those people who sweats when I eat sweet chili heat Doritos ok? Therefore, I’d like to say I was warmer than most graduates that day. So I do my waiting and sweating in this god awful robe that may as well be lined with fleece by this point. I was sweltering. Let’s also remember that I’m wearing stick on nipple covers for the first time, so I kept periodically checking if they were still in place, and they were. The time comes for me to walk across the stage and have my name called and receive my diploma, and everything goes smoothly. I sit back down in my seat, and I can only describe that I heard and felt a ‘plop’. My nipple cover has now plopped onto my thigh. In the middle of the ceremony. Where I’m sitting facing the entire audience. If I don’t retrieve it now it will fall out the next time I stand up for the closing procession. So I absolutely went up my robe to retrieve this nipple thigh cover and put it in my purse. Phew. Wait….let’s check the other one. Yeah, it’s half way down my boob. So I also take that one off and stick it in my purse. I kept my robe on for the rest of the pictures that day and on my drive home realized hey maybe I should put those covers back on…I then find out that only one nipple cover is in my purse. Basically, the other is floating around the graduation auditorium or on campus so I apologize ahead of time to whoever has the pleasure of finding that. But I think I’m going to hide the other one in my brothers room. He doesn’t even read my blogs so I’m safe.

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